A little better

Well my week started off kinda crappy but the last few days haven't been as bad. My classes today went smoothly and I feel a little more together. Together enough to be able to work on the homework I have this weekend. And I am determined to go out and have some fun this weekend even if it's just out to dinner. Or maybe I'll go see a movie. I was thinking of going hiking as well. I can't do all that though. Organic chemistry beckons!
I got to thinking again this week about how I still want to be a doctor. I just HAVE to push through the things that I feel hold me back and just do it. I have to believe I can do it.
Last night my roommate made a good observation. I was in my room listening to some music and I was singing along. My roommate said "you're not crying, so that's good." She's right! I could be in my room crying because i think my life sucks but instead I was jamming to some music and relieving some tension. It got me to a place where I can relax.

I have to start doing research for a paper I have to write. My topic is how Christians should respond to initiatives to legalize same-sex marriage. It's going to be difficult. But, there is definitely a lot of info out there! I got excited about it this afternoon after receiving the latest issue of Time. The cover story is about adolescent homosexuals. i started talking to my roommates about it. Here is what I'm thinking: If Christians are going to be so concerned with making sure gays can't get married because it's a supposedly "unhealthy" and "unnatural" relationship, then they need to look at the fact that the divorce rate among Christans is almost the same as among non-Christians. There is something wrong with how Christians view relationships and how churches are dealing with it. I don't necessarily think that same-sex marriage is what God intended for marriage but I also don't think God intended for heterosexual marriages to be abusive and messed up as a lot of them are these days. It's not about homo vs. hetero marriage. . .it's deeper than that. It's about the individual person and their sexuality and. . . .their humanness.
You also have to consider the definition of marriage. What is it? I don't really know. I see the marriages around me: my parents, my sister, and some of my friends. Is marriage just a human institution that is proved by a marriage certificate? Or is it something else? Is it a spiritual union that mirrors God's desired relationship with humans? Or what?
What is happening that people do not have healthy relationships? I know in my Christian upbringing I was never taught how to relate to men. I was told to not have sex. Big deal. What about everything else? I also wasn't taught to stand up for myself; I thought I always had to play the part of the submissive female.

There are so many parts of this. You have to look at the definition of marriage, how much Christians should get involved in public policy (how far do you go before it violates the 1st amendment), and how much freedom should be entitled to people.
It's difficult to determine. Although legally our nation isn't a Christian nation (as in it's our official religion), there is so much Christian influence because it's such a huge part of our history.
Are Christians demanding so much freedom for themselves that they forget our nation provides everyone should have those same freedoms?

Ok I could go on forever. I need to go to bed.