Before I go crazy

I decided that before Physics drove me too much more crazy, I would write, since it's been awhile. Right now Physics is making me feel really dumb. I have 6 chapters of problems to do. Some of them are almost finished but I still have like 30 problems to do. Two chapters I haven't even been through yet. I try to read through the chapters but it's like it's in Japanese. I don't really understand anything. I also have to write up 10 labs for my lab notebook. I really don't know when that's going to get done. I can't wait until Thanksgiving. But I still have so much to do before then. Tests in all my classes, lots to read, essays to write.
It's days like these when I just think "how the hell do I expect to actually go to med school?" I know I have plenty of other options even if I don't. But I'm not ready to give up on that yet! I always start going towards some goal and then I give up. This is the first thing I've tried to do that I haven't given up on. I'm still a Bio major and I really enjoy it. But I always get caught up on something that just brings me down so much. This time its Physics. I find it so hard to sit down and concentrate. And then it's frustrating because I don't understand it and I don't know how to. I don't know how to study for it. I looked online for some study help but there's not much help.
It's so easy for me to just sit and do nothing for long periods of time. I came home Thursday and watched TV for like 8 hours. That's it. I didn't do anything else. And then Friday the same thing, even though I should've started homework.
I have no idea how to make myself actually get focused and do the work I need to. Even making a list and specifying when I'm going to do each thing doesn't work. I mean there are times when I can make myself focus and get things done, but it's not a constant. It's like I'll be able to concentrate in spurts. It's so frustrating.

Last night I started thinking about how in two months I will be 25. It's not like I thought it was going to be. I'm still in school, I'm alone, and my future is still as unclear as ever. I know things will work out the way they're supposed to but sometimes it's really hard to believe.

I really hope I get to go home for Christmas. It would really suck to be alone on Christmas.