it's so big

Yesterday in chapel we heard a former Muslim from Kuwait speak. He was a POW during the Gulf War and suffered in an Iraqi prison. While there he met a Christian and miraculously got out of the prison and ended up in the US searching for God. He became a Christian. It was interesting to hear.
Then we took some time to pray for the persecuted church around the world, like in Romania, Thailand, and Sudan. In Romania, many children live in orphanages where they suffer from abuse. In Thailand women are forced into prostitution. Prostitution accounts for a huge chunk of of their GDP. It's really sad. Women are kidnapped and sold by their families! In Sudan, AIDS is everywhere and many Christians get persecuted by the Muslims. The whole time I was just thinking how in the world am I supposed to pray for these people? The problems and situations are so big and I'm so small. . .I don't know how to pray for the problems. The stuff in Romania and Thailand mostly has to do with the government and the economic situation. And do I have the right to pray that the Christians in Sudan will not suffer persecution? When I read the Bible it seems that as a Christian I am to expect persecution. I don't know what it's really like. The most persecution I've been through is getting teased in middle school about being a Christian. I haven't had my life threatened because of it. If anything Christians in the US have been the ones persecuting non-Christians. Christians persecute women who get abortions, gays and lesbians, drug addicts and anyone who is not an upstanding Christian citizen. What kind of love is that? Would Jesus really be condemning the woman who because of sexual abuse by a man hates men and goes to a woman for satisfaction? He wouldn't. If anything he's condemning the Christian pharisees (me included) who act like by judging and condemning they are carrying on God's work. It's bullshit. I've realized I have no right to judge anyone. I've gone to find satisfaction in a lot of things instead of God, I've given myself to guys just to feel loved. What's the difference? Isn't it all the same in God's eyes?
Is being a Christian always about setting a perfect example and staying away from what people consider "bad?" What if it's about loving Jesus and being honest even when honesty means saying that we're not sure what we believe? What if it's loving people even when they hurt us and when they do things we wish they hadn't? I'm not perfect and I can't pretend to be. I want to know God and right now writing things like this and talking with my friends is one of the ways I'm searching. Even through my search, somehow I still believe that I can't give up on believing in God and for some reason he's still there holding me, loving me, and molding me.