I have really tried to keep a positive outlook about my life as it is right now. I know I am blessed; I have everything I need. I know I am working towards what I want to do with my life.

But tonight it's hard.

I can't stop thinking that I'm almost 28 and I feel like a failure. I feel like I'm getting nowhere. The things I have wanted the most in my life haven't happened and it can be really hard to deal with. I feel like I should have accomplished more by now. I'm surrounded by people who are married or getting married and having kids and it's really really hard. I'm surrounded by people younger than me who are getting started in their careers (or fairly well-established in them actually) and I feel like because of stupid decisions I've wasted the last 2 or 3 years instead of getting on with what it is I want to do. I hate it. And I hate that I have been feeling like this. I know it's just from being tired and busy which is making me stressed.

I want to just be able to enjoy this part of my life, knowing that I am working towards what I want to do and trust that it's ok that I am where I am in my life. I know things could be a lot worse and I know that I took the steps I needed to go through the CNA class, apply to the PA program and I felt like I was ready. I felt like it was finally the right time. I could know as soon as December (if I don't get an interview) or in February about if I get in.

Like I said, I usually have had a pretty good attitude about everything, taking the being tired and stressed better sometimes than others, but the last few days it's been more difficult.